Being a parent can be very difficult especially if you add autism to the mix. For me that is a challenge, one I am not too fond of. Today I find out if my third son is on the spectrum, which in a Way makes me nervous. If he is diagnosed that will make it three for three. I have five kids, three boys and two girls. None of my boys have escaped the burden of autism so far and the first screening we had with our last was not good at all.
It is so discouraging at times to watch my sons struggle everyday. My nine year old struggles the most and it just breaks my heart. Knowing that he gets bullied at school doesn’t help at all either. It is definitely a hard transition for my babies when it comes to interacting with their peers, strangers, or other social experiences. It’s sad to watch them get overwhelmed when I take them out into the store knowing many are probably viewing him as a bad kid and not one that needs comfort and understanding.
My goal here is to help bring awareness for Autism. So many don’t understand it!!! I hate when people say ‘they don’t look autistic’, well no duh, Autism is so much more involved. Every child, adult, person is different on the spectrum. First ask questions, do research but don’t judge. Until you know the struggle and heartache just pray and be more understanding. Also feel free to check out my website, The Family Way
Recently I have been trying to take a step back and re-evaluate the plan God has in store for me. Ever since I lost my grandfather I have been faced with many hurdles that has changed my perspective of many things. Sometimes we get too comfortable and once our world is shaken or even broken by a catastrophic event in your life it can be nearly impossible to pick up all the pieces. I lost myself in grief and ever since then my life has been tumbling into a spiral vortex until today. Today I realized why my Grandfather sang “Blessed Assurance” and the true meaning of this hymn. My life is not my own, I forgot the meaning of being a servant unto the Lord. I have been selfish and have pushed God away because I was hurt, in pain, and yes even angry. I didn’t know how to cope and I built up a resistance while trying to fix myself. Today I realized as I listened to that song on Pandora that I am wrong and that there is no way for me to fix myself but to lean on the Lord and His Grace. God is with you no matter how bad the storm is in your life! All you have to do is reach out to Him.
Leave it to my two year old Joseph to give me the scare of a lifetime! Last night at 11:00pm…yeah we were all still awake! Well Joe Joe decided to take a stroll without mommy. I was finishing up feeding the baby and I heard Joseph cry! I quickly hear him calm down when another adult consoles him, so I unlatch the baby and position him on the bed so he won’t fall off! I slide off the bed and go hunting for him but realize he is nowhere to be found in the dorm!! I quickly panic and frantically search inside, but no sight of him. Once I realize he isn’t inside the building I race outside with a few more ladies! He was no where to be found. I see a child from the distance that resembles Joe Joe but realize very quickly that was not my son. At this point I felt my whole body go numb. My heart was frantically beating and my stomach was in knots. It was pitch dark and we were in the middle of nowhere! Frantically a whole bunch of other camp counsellors jump on in the search. Well within five minutes of searching he was found!!! He had chased the baby kitten that was on the camp grounds to the other side of the camp! Talk about a relief and a scare that will imprint on me for the rest of my life. There is nothing like the feeling of not knowing where your child is!! I am writing this post to raise awareness! You can turn your back for a second and that’s all it takes!!! I don’t wish that fear, that pain, that feeling upon anyone!
I am sharing this story so other parents are aware of how quickly your child can disappear from your sight. I am fortunate that nothing happened to him and that he is safe but others are not so fortunate.